


Maybe It's Love

by Rachel_Nightwriter



Category: Glee
Genre: Coming Out, F/M, First Time, Getting Together, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-11
Updated: 2017-07-16
Packaged: 2018-11-30 22:12:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 12,275
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11472711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rachel_Nightwriter/pseuds/Rachel_Nightwriter
Summary: After Guilty Pleasure Week, Marley wants to help Sam realise that he has feelings for Blaine. She writes a fanfiction how she imagines his life to be should he not become aware of his attraction to Blaine in time, and lets Sam read it.





	1. Chapter 1

It started with Kitty.

“Such a tragic, tragic story”, she said when they were leaving the auditorium.

“What do you mean?” Marley asked. Kitty didn’t sound sarcastic or mean, thus it was something worth investigating.

“Unreceited love”, Kitty said. “It happens to everyone.”

They walked down the empty hall towards the exit. School was long over.

“How can you know Sam doesn’t like Blaine back?” Marley said. She threw a glance over her shoulder but their Gleek mates weren’t to be seen.

“He clearly was touched”, she added.

“Everbody was touched except Miss I’m-too-good-for-this-world”, Kitty said. “Because it’s so tragic.”

“But Sam…”

“Sam will be a closeted gay until he realises he can’t have Blaine because Blaine is marrying somebody else or something equally binding, and because he’s stupid he won’t say anything then and spend the rest of his life pondering over lost chances.”

Ah, old Kitty was back. She threw Marley an arrogant glance and left the building before her.

“What if we could make him see exactly that?” Marley said, keeping up with Kittys speed.

“Yeah, because he will listen to me. Or you. Or anyone.” Kitty rolled her eyes.

“Okay but… but…” Marley didn’t know what to say anymore. If there was a chance a tragedy could be turned into a romance a with a happy ending, wasn’t it their duty to do everything in their power to make it happen?

Kitty didn’t think so. She got into her car and was gone.

While Marley waited for Unique, who had run to the bathroom, she thought about the situation. And then the perfect solution came to her mind.

 

* * *

\-  _Two weeks or so later_ -

“Lalala…” Humming, Sam went down the hall. School was over. Only Glee now and then it was the weekend, yay! His only problem then would be to decide if he should go to the movies, read comics or work on his newest Doctor Evil impression. That was what a happy boy looked like… for two days of the week at least.

“Sam!” Marley called him when he entered the choir room. She and Unique were often here early but today it was only Marley. When Sam went to sit next to her she pulled some sheets of paper out of her bag.

“I wrote something… for you.”

“For me?” Sam said, buffeled. He wanted to point out that he didn’t like texts without pictures when she added:

“And kind of… about you.”

“About me!?” Sam’s jaw dropped. He got a slight suspicion…

“Is this about Guilty Pleasure week that was two weeks or so ago?” he asked.

“Yes! Wow, are you psychic?”

“Yes, but that’s got nothing to do with it. When a girl writes poems about you, every guy knows what it’s about.”

“It’s not a poem, and I don’t like you. I mean, I do, but not that way”, Marley hurried to explain.

Sam nodded. That’s what they all said in the beginning.

“It’s about you, Blaine, and the biggest mistake of your life.”

Sam frowned.

“You wrote a fanfiction about me and Blaine?”

“A what?”

“Is it Sci-Fi stuff with aliens?”

“No, it’s…”

“Is it Fantasy in which Blaine has to bring a ring to a firy mountain and I’m the one who carries him there?”

“No.”

“Oh, I know! It’s about Time Travel! We go back in time to punch Hitler!” Sam concluded.

“It’s about the future.”

“Yes! Back to the future!” Sam clinched a fist with excitement, and with his other hand he waved Blaine, who just entered.

“Marley wrote a screen play and wants us to play the main parts!” he called out when Blaine was approaching.

“Oh, that sounds exciting.”

“Right?”

But when Sam turned to Marley she had gone up to sit in the front row.

“Weird”, he commented.

But a minute later the Glee end of week song began and he forgot all about it.

* * *

\-  _Only a few hours later_ -

Friday nights were the best. Finn was now a student who was always partying and didn’t even ask Sam to join him. He probably felt superior even though he wasn’t. Anyway, Sam stayed in and played all games that he could put his hands on. He could sit still for hours and hours, it was a special quality of his. He didn’t even worry too much about going to gym these days. Well, at least on weekends.

Then he got a text from Marley.  _‘Are you alone?_ ’ she asked.

So he wrote back: ‘ _yes. Doing the homework_ ’ just in case Blaine had asked her to spy on him.

‘ _Could you take a break and read this then?_ ’ she wrote. Afterwards, she send pics of printed sheets.

Sam zoomed in and looked at the first sentence.

_In the year 2020, Sam Evans was lonely._

Uhem. By 2020 he would be married with children already, thanks very much. Marley sure had a great imagination. But since he knew it was only a movie script he kept on reading. (Hadn’t excepted it to be about him personally, though.)

_In the year 2020, Sam Evans was lonely. All of his friends had moved to New York, and he had stayed in Lima to become a country singer. Sometimes he had a date with a girl but love just wasn’t in the cards for him. And it was his own fault. It all dated back to his senior year when he had made the biggest mistake of his life._

Oh yeah, she had mentioned the mistake thing. Soon, fictional Sam would go back to the past and redo it.

_He had rejected the love of his life._

Or was it about Marley loving him, after all?

_At first, he hadn’t realised he was in love. Because things were so easy, and when things were easy, no one stopped to think about them. One was glad for the break they got and enjoyed all good times especially with exams coming up._

Tell me about it.

_But he knew that his best friend more than adored him. Had a crush on him, maybe even deeper feelings than he would let on. He knew since Guilty Pleasure week…_

Sam shook his head. He had known all year. But there were no ‘deep feelings’. A crush. That was all, and it was okay. Totally. No biggie.

_He knew since Guilty Pleasure week when Blaine had performed the sad song ‘Against All Odds’ and had looked at Sam with such intensity and love that…_

Woah! Hold on a minute! There hadn’t been love. Or intensity. Come on, Marley!

… _love that it had brought tears to everybody present, even the usually mean girl Kitty._

Sam frowned. What? Had people cried? Uhm, no. Tsk, Marley.

_The whole week had arousen suspicion among their friends wether they were secretly dating…_

Say what???

… _but after the Phil Collins song they knew their romantic relationship was rather one sided._

Not. Romance. Just. A. Crush!

_Looking back Sam now realised he had been oblivious to his own feelings. Maybe scared to not fit in anymore, scared to loose his best friend, scared of commitment. He didn’t know why but he had ignored it all - until Blaine got engaged to another man, that is. And just then, when it was too late, Sam had known he was in love. But he had had his chance and decided to not act on it. Instead, he had let Blaine get away and now even lived in another country, far away from him. The end._

Okay, first: He and Blaine would never live farer away from each other then, say, two miles. And second… he needed to talk to Marley, she obviously needed some help to find a therapist. Nothing against romantic fantasies but this one was over the top. So much over the top.

* * *

On Monday, Sam approached Marley at her locker.

“Look, I don’t get how this weird story was supposed to make me ask you out but alright. Here I am. Do you want to go on a date with me?”

Marley looked shocked at him.

“Excuse me, what? No!”

“Offensive, much?” Sam said. She didn’t have to react so horrified.

“I wrote that story because I think it will come true”, she said. “Because I think you are about to make a mistake.”

“Yeah, yeah, the mistake. I get it. Why didn’t you make Sam go back in time? Now _that_ would’ve been interesting.”

Sam casually let his gaze drift. He needed to find a girl to go out with. Now. No idea why.

“But he did”, she said.

“Huh?” Sam blinked his boredome away. Why was Marley still speaking to him?

“ _You_ are future-Sam, now in the past”, she said.

“I am… me in the present”, Sam told her his version of the story.

“But someday, you will be future-Sam. And then this present now will be his past. Do you get it?”

“Of course I do. But you still don’t know what future-Sam would be like.”

“Well, there is one person who knows.”

“Yeah? Who?” Sam looked around, expecting Doctor Brown to storm out of a classroom.

“You, Sam! Just turn inside and realistically ask yourself how your life in five years will be if everything continues like it is.”

With those apparently wise words Marley closed her locker and left. Tsk. Her imagination… was so… stupid!

* * *

A few days later Sam stood in front of the bathroom mirror, leaned towards it and squinted his eyes. There was a red, disgusting pimple! He would squeeze it out like any normal boy would but he had learned the hard way that it made things just worse. Instead, he opened the cupboard and got out his moms make-up.

The doorbell rang, and a few moments later foot steps came up the stairs. Sam opened the bathroom door a few inches and observed the hall. That was how he found out that it was Blaine who came up the stairs. The black haired boy had a back pack thrown over his shoulder and looked at the floor. Then he lifted his eyes and shifted his head - and froze.

“What are you doing there?” he asked.

“Why?” Sam said.

“You’re hiding behind a door while watching me.”

“Well, I didn’t know you would come. Why didn’t you text me?”

“I did. You didn’t answer.”

“Oh.” Sam thought of his phone that was… somewhere. “Well, mabye I was busy?”

Blaine frowned.

“Are you?”

“No… not really.” Sam shrugged.

So he followed Blaine down the hall. In Sam’s room he laid out books on the bed, while Sam sat down, crossed his hands behind his head and observed his best friend. It was a normal activity for him to show up and make Sam study - but why did he? Because he loved him? He wasn’t wearing anything special but a wave of some scent surrounded him. Had he dressed himself with it because he loved Sam?

Then he sat down and opened a book - because he loved Sam?

“What’s up, Sam? Get your papers, come on.”

“I’m really not in the mood to study today.”

“When are you ever?” Blaine frowned at him.

Suddenly Sam remembered something. During Guilty Pleasure week there had been a situation when Blaine had asked if he had feelings for him. Sam hadn’t thought about it on that day because he’d been in a Barry Manilow fever but when he had remembered it the next day he had figured it was a normal question for a boy with a crush. Or was it? Wasn’t it rather a question of someone who was in love?

“Do you remember when you asked me if I had feelings for you?” Sam said.

Blaine, who had continued to read, coughed. His cheeks turned red. Then he carefully looked up and sighed.

“Oh, I feared this day would come”, he said.

Sam nodded. Now was the day of a real confession. He crossed his arms and waited.

“Okay, look.” Blaine closed his book, put it away and changed into lotus position. Probably to reveal his crotch to Sam. Sam had read some articles about body language, he knew stuff like that.

Blaine looked on his hands as he talked on.

“I never wanted to give you a false impression or anything”, he said. “I didn’t expect to… well… you know, we can and should talk about it, sure, but you should know that nothing can ever happen between us. You know that, right?”

Now Blaine looked up, anxious eyes on Sam.

Who was confused as hell.

“It… can’t?”

“No”, Blaine said softly. “I’m sorry. It wouldn’t be fair to both you and Kurt. Because I’m still waiting for a chance, well, when he forgives me, maybe one day… maybe we could…”

“Blaine.” Sam put his hands on his knees and tried to tidy up the different questions running through his head.

“I thought you were over Kurt.”

“I am… but…”

Sam held up his outstretched ring finger.

“Second… I thought you had a crush on me. I mean, you do. Why on earth would you reject me? Even if I was saying what you think I am.”

“You’re…” Blaine frowned. “You’re confessing your feelings for me, don’t you?”

“No! Blaine. I’m straight. Come on.”

Blaine frowned only more. Never ever had he looked like that after Sam had emphasied his female-oriented-sexual-orientation. He had only nodded and said of course and then changed the subject.

“You come on, Sam”, he said now.

“What me, what?”

“You are… I don’t know how to put it. I started crushing on you because I noticed how often you touch me. Or smile at me for a really long time. Longer than a friend would. But I soon realised that I shouldn’t lead you on, so…”

“Whoa, wait a minute. What? Excuse me? I’m not… I’m a nice guy, okay. That’s it. I don’t touch you at all.”

“I’m sorry if I misinterpreted things”, Blaine said. With a still doubtful look.

“You know me better than anyone else, Blaine, don’t you? So don’t start fantasizing now.”

“Yes, I think I do know you.”

Sam shook his head. How could Blaine think that, really? How stupid. What?

“And apart from that”, Sam said. “I can’t believe you would reject me.”

“If you don’t have feelings for me, you shouldn’t feel hurt by that.”

“Nonsense! Of course I would. Rejecting means leaving. Going away. Saying no to the person who wants to be your friend.”

“It only means saying no to being lovers. Nothing more.”

Sam squinted his eyes. No trace of humor in Blaine’s voice or face. He actually was serious.

“So you are not in love with me”, Sam said.

“Sam.” Pityful eyes.

“Don’t look at me like that. It’s okay. I’m not in love with you, either. No matter what Marley thinks.”

“Marley?”

“I asked her out the other day.”

“You did?”

“Yes, believe it or not. I actually like _girls_.” Sam crossed his arms.

“Of course you do”, Blaine said. “I just was really sure you also liked boys.”

“You thought I like…” Sam couldn’t finish it. _Blaine_ of all people thought something like that. But then again…

“Do you think that about all boys that you would like to go down on?” Sam said. It could be wishful thinking. Yeah, that must be it.

“No. And as I said, my crush only started when I thought you were about to move in on me. I wondered if I would go with it and… well.”

“Yes?”

“You know.”

Sam took a deep breath and let his eyes wander through his room. Everything was the same.

“To be clear.” He watched Blaine again. “You would have wanted me at some time but now not anymore?”

“It was a nice fantasy, nothing more”, Blaine clarified.

“I was with Brittany.”

“Not always.”

“But before that you were with Kurt.”

“All I’m saying is that I was lonely. You know that. I…”

“Whoa!” Sam jumped up and pointed at Blaine. “I would have been the man you cheated with!”

“No - don’t go there, Sam. It wasn’t like that.”

“But it was. You were lonely and thought I liked you. And when I didn’t you turned to a stranger.”

Blaine looked at his hands and swallowed.

“I’m not proud of that”, he mumbled.

Sam couldn’t think of anything else, his whole brain was filled with questions marks. He stared at Blaine, who somehow seemed to be another, foreign person.

“So it’s true?” Sam asked.

“It’s true that I was lonely. It’s true that I thought you liked me. But I would not have…”

Blaine put his hands to his face and sobbed.

“Who am I kidding, I would have”, he mumbled.

Sam’s jaw dropped. He was the reason for the break up. Kind of. Did that make him a bad person?

Another sob of Blaine’s pulled him out of his head. He sat down next to Blaine and put his arm around the other, who immediately threw himself against Sam’s chest.

“There, there.” Sam patted Blaine’s back. The algebra book that Blaine had read laid on the bed, as useless as ever.

After a while, Blaine pulled back and drove his hands over his eyes.

“So I just wanted you to like me. My loneliness made it up. I’m sorry, Sam. I… never…”

“It’s okay. Everybody gets lonely from time to time. And I’m hot, so of course you would indulge in fantasies about me.”

Was it good to say something like that? Sam shrugged, and Blaine laughed.

“Yeah. Of course.”

“Let’s not think about it anymore. Do you want to watch a movie?”

Blaine threw a look at his book. Then he nodded.

“And we need nachos.”

* * *

Sam needed several days to digest all that had been said. He even made a list to get it all out of his head:

_1\. Blaine cheated on Kurt because I made him horny as hell_

_2\. I might be a bad person because of that, talk to ~~mum?~~ Mr. Schue?_

_3\. For many months Blaine thought I also like boys_

_4\. Hell he thought I was confessing my feelings for him_

_5\. He’s not in love with me (tell Marley I told you so)_

_6\. S ~~till crush on me? Can’t say~~ Not important forget it_

_7\. Would have rejected me! Not sure how to feel about that._

Sam bit his lip. With the tip of the pen he knocked on the paper. No, the last point shouldn’t be important as well. Like Blaine had said. It had nothing to do with their friendship. So Sam crossed it out.

And then he pondered about the most important question of them all: at the beginning of their friendship… had he behaved in a way that justified Blaine’s suspicions?

Well. Of course he had behaved affectionate because he had just found out how awesome Blaine was, how much they had in common and how great it was to have someone to bing watch all the cool movies with! Yes, he had lived out his manly adoration for him. So what? Didn’t justify Blaine putting sexual context into it. Nope.

Okay. Now.

And what if Blaine had made a move on Sam?

Of course Sam had spent some amount of time wondering about Blaine’s sexuality. How could he not, he never ever had a gay bro before.

Didn’t mean he would’ve done anything. At all.

* * *

On the next day Sam waited until Brittany came to her locker. He had an important question for her.

“Hello Sam! Have you been on holiday?”

“What? No. I was here. In school.”

“Oh. I thought you had gone away.”

“Brittany? Are we still dating?”

Brittany got out a book and closed her locker.

“Because you haven’t called me back for weeks now and spent much time with other people and…” Sam said.

“I was getting some lady kisses from my new neighbour”, Brittany said.

“Oh. Okay. So, no hard feelings. Just would have been nice if you told me.”

“Do you want to make out tonight?” Brittany asked.

“Uhm. Kind of thought we just broke up…?”

“Why? Do you want to break up?”

“Uhm. Uh.” Sam looked around. “No. Of course not. I’ll come over at seven then.”

He needed a girl, and there she was. Perfect, right?

“Good. You can tell me all about you and Blaine, then.”

“Why? What? Who told you?”

“Oh Sam. I saw you two make out the other day. It was so hot.” She winked, then hopped away.

Sam scratched his head. Things had gotten even weirder right now.

* * *

“What the hell is that?”

“It’s a wig.” Brittany adjusted her new black, curly hair.

Sam on the other hand had not meant this new hair style. He pointed at her crotch, and she looked down.

“Oh, that’s a dildo strap. I use it with girls sometimes.”

“Why do you wear it now?”

Sam had thought they were having a really nice time. He had arrived half an hour earlier, and they had been snogging ever since. Clothes had vanished. A lube and a condom had appeared, they had put fingers into each others holes and all that usual stuff.

Then Brittany had gone to the bathroom for only five minutes and emerged looking like a boy: She wore an oversized plaid shirt, had her blond hair hidden under more or less short black hair and her crotch… was… pointing at Sam.

Now Brittany crawled on the bed towards him.

“You can put a condom on it, Sam, and lube. It will be hot.”

“Uuuuuhm. Why?”

Sam’s eyes were wide open, and he couldn’t bring himself to look at her face. But when he did, he frightened like hell because for one second he saw Blaine. That stupid wig.

“Do you have to wear that, too?” he asked in a high voice.

“Don’t you like it?”

“It reminds me of a boy.”

“Hot, right?”

“I…” Sam licked over his lips and tuned in to his guts. Tingling and heat waves. So he nooded.

“Kind of hot.”

“I knew you’d like it.” Brittany took the lube, put it on her finger and positioned herself in front of Sam, whom she told to relax.

Sam crossed his arms behind his neck and closed his eyes. Soon, she pushed her tiny finger into his butt. She knew what she was doing, didn’t go too far in and massaged with just the right pressure until it got to Sam. His breathing got heavier and he touched his own nipples.

“Okay, more”, he said.

Yes, they had used this as foreplay before. It wasn’t gay when a girl did it for you.

“Can I fuck you now?” Brittany asked.

“No!” Sam froze. “No… Brit… just…”

Sam took her hand away and got up. He placed himself in front of her, then he carefully put his hand around her dildo. What a weird feeling.

“You smell… like…?” he said.

“I used my dads aftershave.”

“Oh.”

Sam looked down on what he was touching. It looked so real but of course it was plastic. It wouldn’t help her if he rubbed it.

“Do you want to put lube on now?” Brittany asked.

“Why? I’m not going to let you do me. But… if you want to keep this little roleplay up I could take you from behind.”

“Doggy stile!”

“Yes.”

“I will speak lower so you can pretend I’m a boy. Like _thiiiis_.” Brittany demonstrated her lower voice, which still sounded female. So Sam nodded.

“Sure, whatever you like.”

“You are the quarterback and I’m your best friend, congratulating you after the game!”

Brittany jumped up and walked to the door.

“Let’s say just a friend. Not best friend”, Sam said.

She leaned against the door frame and said in her low voice: “Why, how sexy you looked on the field, Sam.”

Sam got up, too, and didn’t feel like he was in the locker room because he was naked and fully erected. He would never greet a buddy that way. But well. He took a few steps towards her.

“Thanks”, he said. “Uhm, do I deserve a treat because I made a home run?”

Brittany took his hands and put them on her waist.

“You can take whatever treat you like, Sam Evans, you hot quarterback.”

She kissed him, and he went with it while he pressed himself against her. The plastic dildo got in the way and he shoved it aside. It came back.

“What the…”

Brittany giggled. “It’s connected to me, Sam. It’s my dick.”

“Well, I know a solution for that.” Sam grinned and turned her around. Brittany waggled with her butt, and put her hands on both sides of the door frame.

“Take me, Sam!” she said. “With you own big dick!”

She pulled something out of the pocket of her shirt and reached it over her shoulder. Sam took the condom and opened it. Against the door then. Why not.

He approached her, put his nose into black curls, one hand on the waist and with the other he drove over her butt and downwards until he reached the place between the legs. With his eyes closed he breathed in a manly smell, and had to gulp.

Brittany pushed herself onto him. Sam didn’t wait too long until he replaced his finger. Biting his lip, he moaned while gliding in and suddenly his brain was crazy again. This was Blaine, moaning together with him. Blaine who had one hand on Sam’s hip to help with the rhythm, Blaine who smelled like sweet aftershave. Blaine, who he thrust against the door over and over again. And wow, it was good.

“Blaine… wow, so hot… oh God, you feel so fucking good. Blaine. Goddamnit!”

“You’re so good, Sam”, Blaine responded. “And so thick. So swell.”

“Do you like it?” Sam asked.

“You can fuck me night and day, Sam, that’s how much I like it.”

“Oh god, Blaine…” Sam bit his lip and fastened his speed. He had gotten too close too fast but… ugh. Blaine. Blaineblaineblaaaiine.

“That was fast”, Brittany said when Sam pulled out.

“Sorry… That fantasy really got to me.”

“Did I do Blaine right?”

Sam drove a hand through his hair. Then he pulled off the condome and went to the bin.

“Damn it. I can’t believe this”, he said. “I just had sex with my best friend.”

“Oh, I didn’t know I was your best friend!” Brittany said. She went to the bed, laid down and undid the strap so she could turn it around and push the dildo into herself. It wasn’t quite right that Sam didn’t help her after having come inside of her but somehow his mind was still clouded with Blaine’s face.

Shit. What just happened?

* * *

The next weekend, Sam stayed alone all the time. He couldn’t deal with Blaine just about now. He needed distance, air and also space.

Of course he didn’t tell Blaine. He simply wrote him that he was busy. It wasn’t like they spend all weekends together, anyway. They were friends, after all, nothing more.

So yeah.

On Wednesday Blaine came up to Sam, leaned against the lockers and crossed his arms.

“Why are you avoiding me?”

“Am not!” Sam had thought that Blaine would think that and thus had the best answer now. “I’m just busy with school stuff.”

“No, you’re not.”

“I’m busy with _life_. Okay? I have a life without you!”

Blaine sighed, and drove a hand over his mouth.

“Is it because of our talk last week? Cause you know I was not rejecting your friendship, right?”

“Yes, no, I don’t know, things are a bit confusing right now. I’m trying to figure them out.”

“Couldn’t I help you with that?”

Sam looked around. Students were walking by, talking, laughing, living. Then he glanced at Blaine, who studied him with his best puppy-eyes-face. So cute. And his lips were pretty red and probably soft, too, so…

“No, I don’t think you can.”

And Sam turned away.

* * *

At the end of the school day he closed his locker - and jumped.

“Boy!” he said, putting a hand to his heart. Blaine stood there.

“Give me a day, one day to show that I can be as good a friend to you as you were to me. Are to me”, Blaine said. “I know, we mostly talke about my problems, and I really want to listen to yours. And help you. Friendship is a two-way street, isn’t it?”

“Are you going to sing?” Sam raised his eyebrows.

“You know I will.”

“What song?”

“Kryptonite?” Blaine pulled a face like he was half embarassed, half asking his permission.

It was cute, so cute, Sam couldn’t deny it anymore. His heart opened up and a grin climbed on his face.

“Bring it on.”

Blaine really was a good friend. Yes, yes, Sam always thought ‘best friend’ but that was only because he hadn’t had really close friends before, and he had the most fun with Blaine. But they also only talked regularly to each other since six months, and how close could you get in that time? He wasn’t the type of person who got close to someone that fast. Not if there was a risk of them leaving him, not after Quinn had destroyed his naive hopes of love at first sight. 

But maybe they were closer than Sam had thought. Maybe he could actually tell him about what was going on in his crazy head.

* * *

 

“So. What’s your kryptonite?” Blaine asked after the song - such a fun song it was - had ended.

They were in the auditorium, alone, because that’s what friends did. It wasn’t weird, because they had done things like that before. And it also was the place where Blaine had confessed his feelings, so, yeah, it was a special place.

Sam put his guitar away and wrung his hands. Then he looked at Blaine.

“Okay, here’s the thing. I’m totally lost in my head, like, there’s this new thing that happened and I… think… it means something.”

“Yeah?”

Sam took a deep breath. He knew he could tell Blaine everything, there was no one more understanding in Glee club, maybe even in the whole school.

“I think you were right the other day.”

Blaine didn’t catch on, so Sam gathered up more courage.

“I think I do… or am able to like boys. I don’t know how or why but I guess… I…”

Sam bit his lip and looked at the ground.

“Have a crush on you?”

Oh God. Why had he said that, damn it, no, that wasn’t the plan! Shit, shit! He didn’t, he so didn’t! Okay, he did but come on! Why would he -

“It’s okay”, Blaine said. So Sam looked up.

“Is it? Cause it feels weird. You are my friend, and…”

“Hey, like you said to me, nothing is going to change, Sam. I’m okay with it.”

“You’re not surprised, either.”

Blaine shrugged, then smiled.

“I know it’s the middle of the week but I think you deserve some pizza. Breadstiix? My treat, of course.”

“Pity date?” Sam asked with half a smile. Blaine laughed and boxed his arm.

“Frienship date.”

“Is that a thing?”

“It is if we want it to.”

“Okay. Hey, Blaine?”

“Yeah?”

“Did you know that our friends thought we were dating, during Guilty Pleasure week?”

“Artie hinted something, yes. So what?” Blaine shrugged.

“How weird. They should know us better, don’t they?”

“I guess they sensed our awesome friendship and wished to have something like that, too.”

Sam nodded. Yeah. That must be it.

* * *

It felt good, really good to have talked to Blaine. Now the secret was out, Sam’s heart wasn’t heavy anymore and he could focus on his life again. Alsmost as if nothing had changed.

Though… when he tried to look at girls that night he found himself rather distracted by their male company.

“Oh my god.” Sam put his hands in front of his face to hide.

“What?” Blaine asked.

“I’m actually checking out guys now? Am I… like… why is this happening all of a sudden?”

He sighed and took down his hands. As expected, Blaine was nothing but sweet about it.

“You probably suppressed it, and now it takes it’s chance to come out and play”, he said.

“But I don’t remember suppressing anything! There were girls… and my head went blank. Boom. Nothing more.”

Sam showed in a gesture how his head had exploded. Blaine laughed.

“Then it was your feelings for the girls that suppressed the other side of you. And lately you haven’t seen any girls so…”

“I’m still dating Brittany.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah, I didn’t think it, either, well, we’re more like in an open relationship, I guess, since she is seeing another girl. But we still, uh, see each other.”

“But in the last weeks you haven’t, have you?”

“Yeah, we kind of were over for four weeks, or longer? And I focused on you. You’re right, that’s what might have brought out my other side.”

“Your gay side, Sam. You can say the word.”

Sam shook his head. Too early, way too early.

“But you don’t have to, of course. Take your time.”

Blaine reached over the table to squeeze Sam’s hand, and some small but warm sparklers burnt down his stomach. It  _was_ how he would feel about a girl, no doubt. Wow. 

“A whole new world”, Sam said.

Blaine chuckled. “Do you want to sing another song?”

“Right here wouldn’t be the best choice”, Sam said, not letting Blaine’s eyes go.

“No…”

“One pizza and one Ceasarian salad.” The waitress put dishes on the table.

Sam jerked up, pulled his hand back and looked strictly on the food. His whole body was on fire and, not by choice, his crotch was pulsating with blood. Damn it, body, this wasn’t the time, or place, or situation, or even right person for this kind of action. Cool it, man. Cool it.

* * *

Next time Sam walked into Glee club, which was on Friday, he was met with applause. Well, from one person, and definitively not meant serious.

He stopped in his tracks and frowned at Kitty, who chilled on the piano. Now she jumped down.

“Congrats, Sam, I wouldn’t have thought you’d ever get your shit together. I’m impressed”, she said.

“About…?”

“You, coming out.” She frowned.

Suddenly Sam remembered that he hadn’t asked Brittany about why she thought she had seen him and Blaine making out.

“I… what? Did Blaine tell you?” Sam asked, although he would never believe that.

“ _You_ told me”, she said. “Or rather, told my spies, which I have everywhere. They tell me you and gay Frodo have been on a date earlier this week.”

“Out of _friendship!_ ” Sam said.

“Sure, sure, if that’s what you tell your granny. Congrats. I really thought you’d be a pathetic fool for love until the end of your life. Well. Might still happen, but, you know.”

She shrugged and went to the chairs, no longer talking to him. So Sam did the same, seeking comfort with his buddies Jake and Ryder. They greeted him normally, so probably hadn’t heard the rumors Kitty was spreading.

“Are you still in tomorrow?” Jake asked.

“Duh! Cincinnati Bengals against Tennessee Titans? I wouldn’t miss it even if I was dying”, Sam said. “I just can’t decide who to vote for. Both are kind of from my hometown.”

“That’s good, right, so no matter who wins you’ll be happy”, Ryder said.

“Will you bring Blaine?” Jake asked.

“I don’t know, should I?” Sam asked. What a strange question. Couldn’t Jake asked Blaine himself?

“He can bring him if he wants to”, Ryder said. “It’s not like Blaine is a girl.”

“Uh… hu?” Sam said.

“No, well, I don’t know how it works with boyfriends, though”, Jake admitted.

“Why would it work any different, right, Sam? If Blaine likes sports, bring him. It’s not like we’re behaving very rude.”

“Blaine does like sports”, was all that Sam could say at that moment. “Sometimes we watch games together. He’s fan of the Browns.”

“So it’s settled.” Ryder hit Sam’s shoulder, and he nodded.

They were assuming he and Blaine were a thing without even asking for confirmation. Well, their fault. They would soon enough see that nothing was going on.

* * *

“So, uhm, Jake asked me to ask you if you want to join us watching football tomorrow”, Sam said when he and Blaine met up at the school front doors after Glee.

Blaine frowned. “Why didn’t he ask me himself?”

“Cause he thinks you’re my boyfriend. Kitty told everybody.”

Blaine sighed. “Again? Why does nobody ask us if it’s true?”

“Right? That’s so immature. They know I’m with Brittany.”

“Well…”

“And that you are still in love with Kurt.”

“Well…”

“And I told Kitty that we only were on a friendship date on Wednesday!”

“Huh.” Blaine bit his lip.

“So yeah, they are stupid!”

They were on the way to the parking lot and Sam was looking for Blaine’s red VW. When he arrived there he had to wait for Blaine, who was walking rather slow and lost in thoughts.

“Dude? Open the car.”

He did, and Sam got inside. When Blaine did, too, he closed the door and again did nothing.

“Dude?” Sam asked again.

“Do you think we are the stupid ones for not dating?” Blaine asked.

“What?” Everything went blank again.

“I mean, we feel mutual attraction to one another. We’re both not in serious relationships, and yes I know I said I’m still hoping that I could get Kurt back but how realistic is that, really? Do I even want it, except out of guilt and the feeling I need to make things alright again? I don’t know!”

Blaine put his hands on the steering wheel and cramped his fingers around it.

Sam didn’t know what to say. He scratched his head and let his eyes wander over the radio of the car. His heart was hammering in his chest and made breathing pretty hard.

“Now I sound like the biggest butthole ever, don’t I, calculating and everything”, Blaine went on. “Oh, screw it, it would be best if I just don’t date anyone ever again. It would only end in heartbreak.”

“You’re not…”

“I don’t know what I was thinking. I’m sorry. Of course I wouldn’t want to risk our friendship, Sam, you’re way important to me.”

Blaine smiled, though it didn’t feel sincere. Sam stared at him, still not spealing due to the clump in his throat. The possibilty that he and Blaine could be something… would he want that? Would he?

“I shouldn’t have said anything”, Blaine sighed.

“No. I mean, it’s okay”, Sam quickly said before Blaine could think badly about himself again.

“It’s the question in the room, isn’t it, why don’t we date? But we have our reasons. We should tell them, well, not all the reasons but that we don’t. Date. And ask them to respect that. Just because there’s a mutual crush between two people doesn’t make them love each other, right? And I only do love, man.”

Sam nudged Blaine, whose smile turned more earnest.

“Or at least you think you do”, he said.

“What?”

“Oh, no, sorry. Again. I’m just… I shut up now.”

“ _What?_ ” 

Blaine leaned back in his seat and shook his head.

“Well, it’s just that there doesn’t seem much love between you and Brittany. No romantic love, that it.”

“Maybe. But I’m also a teenage boy who has needs”, Sam said. At least that was what he had found in his mind when he had asked himself why he kept up seeing Brittany who after all still talked about the other girl and her ‘lady kisses’.

“So don’t say you only do love.” Blaine turned the keyes around and the motor started. He had sounded angry, but why should he be? It probably was his nerves, yeah.

There wasn’t much talk on the drive home, and when Blaine had let Sam out he only said ‘see you soon’. He hadn’t said if he would come to Jakes’ the next day and Sam still thought about that when he went inside. He also thought about ‘the question’. Would he want to date Blaine? As exciting as it sounded Blaine was right, their friendship was important. And they didn’t seem to be meant for each other, just crushing a little bit because no one better was around.

“Sam?”

Sam threw his bag on the stairs and went to the kitchen, from where he had been called.

“Finn! You, here, on a Friday?” Sam said. The other boy sat on the table and was peeling some fruit.

“I still live here, don’t I?”

“I haven’t seen you in weeks, man.”

“I was your teacher in Glee club only one hour ago.”

“Doesn’t count.”

“Yeah, I get that you were distracted.”

Sam frowned while he watched Finn putting the fruit into the mixer.

“I wasn’t.”

“You kept looking around the whole time and I only didn’t call you out because it was Friday afternoon.”

“What are you doing, anyway?” Sam sat down opposite to his friend.

“Smoothies. Good for your health.”

“Cool. But the green ones are better, you’ve got to -”

Finn pointed at the bottle of Vodka that also stood on the table.

“Oh. But then it isn’t healthy anymore.”

“I’ve got some friends coming over.”

“But Carol and Burt…”

“Are in Florida for the weekend.”

“Oh, yeah. I forgot.”

Finn got up, threw the peels away and washed up. With a towel in his hands he came back to the table.

“Is it true what Kitty said? About you and Blaine?” he asked.

“No, no, it’s not. Not boyfriends, not anything. She saw us eating out, totally normal meal and everything.”

“Oh. Well, I doubted it but everybody was like ‘yeah I knew it first’ or something like that. Weird.”

“Right! So weird. So, party, tonight?”

“Yes. Well, boys will be here, too, but we can look forward to many girls.”

“Or the boys. Right.” Sam nodded. He needed some experiences, that was it.

Finn gave him a look.

“Hey, just because I don’t do Blaine doesn’t mean I don’t want to get it on with boys in general”, Sam said.

Finn nodded.

“Thanks for the update.”

“You’re welcome. Don’t want you go into shock.”

“Nice of you.”

“I know.”

"So you'll life out your gayness tonight?"

"On that, my friend, you can bet", Sam said with a grin as he got up. Time to get ready for the night.

* * *

- _tbc_ \- 

 


	2. Chapter 2

It was the clichee ‘my parents are out for the night’ party that you saw in all of the cool movies. The house was full pretty soon, and Finn said he didn’t even know half of those people but he also didn’t care. Neither did Sam. He had a beer in his hand and walked around, watching stupid guys shout stupid things and observed couples hooking up. Some girls looked at him but he didn’t look back since he wanted to find a boy. It couldn’t be hard, right, nowadays so many people were gay or bi.

“Hey, male hot blond.”

_Ah_ _here we go_ , Sam thought as he turned around.

“From your looks I’d say you’re straight but you keep ignoring all those girls that flirt with you”, the boy said.

Sam frowned. He knew the boy but he didn’t seem to remember him.

“Am I right?” the boys asked.

“Uhm. You’re Sebastian something”, Sam said. “Blaine’s former friend.”

“And you even know me already. Fate must love me. So you are…?”

Sam looked up and down the other one. He wore casual clothes (which looked odd but then again who’d show up in a school uniform on a party?), green sweater and jeans. He looked so _normal_ , not evil or anything.

“Is Blaine here, too?” Sebastian asked.

“No. Why?” Sam squinted his eyes.

“Just asking.” Sebastan shrugged.

“This will only lead to complications, can’t have that, bye.” Sam turned around. There had to be other gay dudes around.

“Great. I _love_ complications”, Sebastian said, following him. “Can I get you a drink?”

“I already have one.”

“Yeah, but you know. It’s the gesture that counts.”

“I told you I can’t do that! You. Well.”

“It’s just a drink, hot blond.”

“My name is Sam.”

“Good to know. Wait here, I’ll be right back.”

Of course, Sam did’t wait. Nope. He went out to the back yard, stood under a dark sky and sighed into the night. Then, he realised he’d stepped right into the petting-zone. Couples were kissing on the bench, on the grass, leaning against the wall.

“Oh, Sam, already?” Sebastian said and he appeared next to Sam, offering him a drink.

“Did you put something in it? Like rock salt?”

“Where would I get salt from at this time of the night, and why would I put it into you’re drink? I’m trying to get into your pants, not kill you.”

Sam took the glass. His one was almost empty, anyway.

“Because you threw a shlushi at Blaine… rock salt…” Sam mumbled.

“I appologized for that, and afterwards I turned good. How much convincing do you need?”

Sam shrugged and looked up at the stars. Or, well, various light points that were moving through the blackness. _Can we pretend that airplanes on the night sky are shooting stars? I could really use a wish right now._

“What would you wish for?” he asked Sebastian. “If the planes were shooting stars.”

“That you like me.” Smirk.

“I can only like you if you tell me the truth. Godshonesttruth.” Sam drank the rest of his beer and hiccuped.

“Alright. Well, I guess I’d wish that I get into NYADA, and if not then at least NYU.”

“Oh no, not you too”, Sam said, eyes rolling. “What’s so special about that school? Why is everyone crazy about it?”

“Because of it’s reputition. If you can make it there, you can make it pretty much everywhere”, Sebastian said.

Sam pulled a face. He didn’t even know what he wanted to do after school, while everybody else had plans to move to New York. Such a stupid city.

“What’s your wish?” Sebastian asked.

Sam put his empty glass on the table. Then he turned to Sebastian.

“That you shut up”, he said, approached him and pressed his mouth on the other’s.

* * *

“SAM!? WAKE UP AND HELP ME CLEAN, WILL YOU?”

Sam put his hands to his ears.

“Man! Don’t scream!”

“I’M NOT SCREAMING, YOU MORON, YOU’RE HUNGOVER. COME ON, GET UP!”

Finn left the room and Sam pulled a pillow over his head. Ugh.

“But your parents won’t be home until tomorrow”, Sam said when he arrived downstairs.

Finn stood in the middle of a trash field and spread out his arms.

“DOES THIS LOOK LIKE WE’LL BE READY BEFORE TOMORROW?”

“Man… shhh.” Sam put a hand to his head. “I’ll go take a shower first.”

“THAT’S PROBABLY FOR THE BEST.”

While he stood under the shower Sam tried not to fall asleep again. His head was pounding with a profound headache. The water fell over his face and ears, swooshing like a waterfall.

Sebastian.

Sam tore his eyes open. Shit! Had that… Had he kissed the Dalton-villain, seriously? Daaaamn.

Within minutes Sam was dressed and had his phone pressed to his ear. Water drippled down his neck while he paced his room.

“Pick up, pick up, pick up.”

“Yeah.” Yawn.

“Blaine, don’t fall into a koma, please.”

“Okay.”

“Finn had a party here yesterday and I kissed a boy, who… that…”

“Oh. Well. Good for you.”

“But the thing is… please don’t be mad.”

“Sam. You don’t have to ask my permission to kiss anyone.”

Sam bit his lip. Not even a hint of jealousy, really? _Mutual attraction_ , those were Blaine’s words. But where was that?

“It’s not about what I did but with whom”, he said.

“Finn?”

“O M G! No! Euw, he’s our teacher!”

“Then who, Sam, and why would I care?”

Ouch. Sam stopped pacing.

“Why would you _not_ care? Aren’t you my best friend?”

“I didn’t mean it like that. Just spill it out.”

Sam squinted his eyes. Why did Blaine sound so mean, so uninterested?

“You know what, I don’t want to bother you”, Sam said. “See you later. Or on Monday. Whatever.”

He interrupted the connection and looked at the phone in his hand. His breathing was going fast and his fist was clenched. He wanted to scream at Blaine. But it was not logical, in fact there was no reason why he would be angry at Blaine.

But he was. So that was a reason. Yeah.

* * *

 

Finn mercifully allowed a cleaning break because he, too, wanted to watch the game. That’s why they drove to Jake’s later that day.

Naturally, Finn took the first opportunity and told their buddies all about Sam’s adventures from the night before. And as expected, both friends’ jaws dropped.

“But… you and Blaine?” Ryder asked.

“They are not a thing, guys, I told you”, Finn said.

“I need to hear it from Sam”, Jake said.

“We’re not a thing. We’re not dating, not seeing each other and not doing anything except being friends”, Sam informed them. “Don’t believe everything Kitty says.”

“Not only Kitty.” Ryder shook his head. “Brittany told me, and well, she oughta know, right?”

“She’s got a wild imagination”, Sam said. “Pretty wild.”

Nobody even mentioned any marvelling about Sam kissing a boy. Well. That must’ve been the easierst outing in history.

* * *

 

“I’m sorry. To my excuse, I was still drunk from the night before”, Sam said on Monday morning the minute he saw Blaine.

“I’m sorry, too. I had just woken up and hadn’t even had coffee”, Blaine said.

“Friends again?”

“Always.”

Blaine shook Sam’s hand, and Sam pulled him into a hug. That was how easy it was with best friends. Life was great, wasn’t it?

“So, who did you kiss?” Blaine asked when they separated.

“Does it matter? I’m not seeing him or anything. I just wanted to make experiences.”

Blaine nodded. “So you’re officially out, now, or…?”

“I don’t know. Man.” Sam leaned against the locker while Blaine opened his.

“I mean, Finn saw me kissing that guy and told Jake and Ryder, who by the way now know that we’re just friends, and I guess they thought I was bi anyway. I haven’t told my parents but at least in Glee, yeah, I guess it’s official.”

“Great.” Blaine smiled. “Now we can check out guys together.”

“And paint our nails?” Sam returned the grin.

“Nope, that’s not what gay guys to on a bro-night.”

“Uh, you need to tell me all gay secrets now. Is there, like, a ritual that initiates me into the Gay Brotherhood?”

Blaine laughed and shook his head.

“Your party kiss was all the initiation you get, I’m afraid.”

“Yeah. Well, that and my first time of gay sex.”

“And that.” Blaine’s cheeks got red. How cute he was, blushing like a virgin.

“How was your first time?” Sam asked.

Yeah, their conversations just had gotten a new hot topic, hadn’t they?

“It was okay.”

“Okay?”

“Don’t expect everything to be super great immediately. It’s a slow build, most of the times.”

Blaine closed his locker and nodded at Sam’s back pack on the floor.

“Don’t you have to get to class?”

“I do.” Sam took it up. “But I expect a detailed report later.”

“We’ll see about that.” Blaine laughed and walked away.

“Nice butt”, Sam smirked. Then he looked around, nobody had heard him, good, and hurried to class. It might’ve been the first time he noticed Blaine’s behind but it certainly wouldn’t be the last time.

* * *

 

The week went by unbelievably fast. Sam only turned around once and it was already Friday. At that day, Marley came to his locker and sighed.

“Sam. I heard about your party and I can’t say that this is what not making the mistake looks like.”

Sam frowned.

“I am living my life, what’s wrong with that?”

“But Blaine…”

“Is my friend, and nothing more. I told Jake, I told Ryder, and they should have told you when they gossiped about me.”

“So that’s it?” she asked. “You really don’t have any feelings for Blaine?”

Sam looked around. No one from Glee club was around but should he tell her? She would only be more annoying, wouldn’t she?

So he shook his head.

“Nope. None at all.”

“Then I was wrong, I’m sorry. I just thought I felt a vibe between you two.”

“An awesome friendship vibe, that’s it.”

“No, a romantic love vibe.”

“Phh.”

“Well, I was wrong. Again, sorry. Forgiven and forgotten?”

“Yeah, of course. We’re Glee friends forever and ever.”

Sam offered his hand. Marley shook it, nodded at him and went her own way.

Sam on the other hand got out his phone and opened the messages from her. He reread the fanfiction she had written about him and Blaine, oh my, she had really thought Blaine loved him. _Love_. But that wasn’t the case. So what was it that Marley had seen? Or maybe she had the same wild imagination as Brittany had?

By the way. Sam sent said blonde a text, asking for a meeting. His teenage hormons needed an outing.

‘ _Date tonite?”_

‘ _Okaydoki!”’_

‘ _Can you wear that wig again?’_

‘ _Yes! I have an idea Sam, wait until 7 pm then come over to my house! We can fuck all night! I buy viagra!’_

‘ _Not neccessary. That wig will do.’_

Sam read the messages. Was that a weird conversation? Nah. Totally normal. Totally.

* * *

When Sam came over to Brittanys she showed him her brilliant idea. During the day, she had made some videos, that she now was busy putting together.

“I followed Blaine around”, she explained. “I have many shots from his backside but that’s good, too, right? When I tried to film his penis he said I should go away, he wouldn’t pull down his trousers for me, not even in the mens room.”

“Oh my God, Brittany, did you follow him to the bathroom?”

“Of course.”

“Of course”, Sam sighed. He sat down on the bed and shook his head. Why was she doing that, anyway?

“Uh, Brit? About… when you said you saw me and Blaine make out…?”

“Oh, that was hot”, she nodded.

“When was that?”

“Some weeks ago, don’t you remember, Sam? We were in the school hallway. You two kissed and I put off my clothes because you were so hot!”

“Oh”, Sam said. “It was a dream.”

“Maybe. But it was hot.”

Sam watched her work for some time. In most videos she was talking her ususal nonesense, walking next to Blaine, from whom only the legs were to be seen. Sometimes the camera went slightly behind and filmed the bootie. It was nice but still wrong.

“I don’t know how comfortable I’m with that”, Sam said.

“Oh! Here, listen, I asked him about you!” She turned the volume up.

“Blaine Warbler! On a scale from one to ten, how hot do you think I am?” she, in the video, said.

“I couldn’t say, Brittany, you know I’m gay.”

“Oh, then who do like? Someone from Glee? On a scale from one to ten, how hot is your crush from Glee?”

Blaine laughed awkwardly while he put something into his lockers. The camera moved to up, when Brittany had probably moved her hand to the top of the lockers. It showed Blaine’s face now, and he clearly wasn’t aware that Brittany was recording.

“Ten, I’d say, yeah, a perfect ten”, Blaine said.

Video-Brittany giggled. “I think Sam’s a ten, too.”

Blaine blushed again. “Don’t tell him I said that.”

“But he will know.”

Blaine shook his head, hurried to close the locker and went away.

“Brittany! That’s totally private!” Sam exclaimed. There was a line, and she had crossed it. She couldn’t get away with everything, could she?

Brittany pulled a face. “I wanted to ask him to join us tonight. As a surprise for you.”

“Oh God, tell me you didn’t.”

“No, he ran away from me all the time after that.”

“Good lord.” Sam put his hands to his face.

“Sam, can you lick my armpits later?”

A ten. Blaine thought he was a ten. Wow.

“Sam, can you?”

“Huh? What?”

“I like it when they feel moist.”

A cat jumped on Brittanys lap and Sam knew she would be busy with it for the next minutes. So he laid back on the bed and massaged his temples. This was crazy, she was crazy. They should break up. Like Blaine had said, there was no real love here. But then again, Sam had known this all along. He had just come for sex. And he didn’t even feel bad about it because Brittany wasn’t a girl that got used. Rather, he felt like the used one here, well, he would if he cared enough to think about it. Which was never a good idea.

“Sam? Yes?”

“What?” he asked without looking up.

“Can Lord Tubbington stay here?”

“No. That’s where I draw the line. No cats or other animals involved. Nope.” He violently shook his head.

“He just wants to watch.”

“Doesn’t he, anyway?”

“Not while he’s on the bed.”

Sam sighed, very, very deep. “Well. Let him watch, then.”

And after tonight, he’d end this crazy thing with her, anyway. Yup.

* * *

 

Sam straddled Blaine, and curiously undid the zipper of his pants. Pulled them down, revealed red boxers and the outline of a swelling dick. It was the most fascinating sight he had ever seen, and compelling, it was, and magically draw Sam’s mouth to it until he laid his open lips on the texture of the boxers. Warm, hot, and soooblaine.

Sam opened his eyes. He lay in his bed. No, please, couldn’t the dream go on? It was the best thing that had happened to Sam since, like, in forever. He closed his eyes and willed the pictures to come back while he pushed his own hand down the sheets. He was naked, anyway.

“Sam?” Brittany mumbled.

“Blaine”, Sam murmured.

“Hot dream?”

“Mhuh.”

“Should I blow you?”

“Yeah…”

She vanished, and then Sam felt lips sucking on his half erected penis. It was Blaine’s mouth, going down and up on him, scratching with his teeth oh so teasingly. Then Blaine’s hand appeared, too, and helped. And then Blaine swallowed all of Sam’s cum, and sucked a bit more until Sam was totally empty and fell back into sleep, or maybe he simply passed out.

* * *

 

Why didn’t want Blaine to do anything? They were both free, he had said so himself. He thought Sam was a ten, and he didn’t love Kurt anymore. So why, really?

Of course, the friendship reason. Sam got it. But in the end, wouldn’t it destroy their friendship if they fantasied about each other but kept their hands to themselves?

Oh, it were rebellious thoughts that had filled Sam all day long. Right now he was on his way over to his friend’s house and not sure how to behave. Should he try to kiss Blaine, or talk about it first? Yeah, maybe talk because Blaine would be pissed otherwise. Or would he? Did he need to be convinced, or did he want to be seduced? Or did he want some kind of a romantic gesture to make sure Sam was serious about him? Was he, though, if he just had a crush and sexual fantasies? Or was it more? Sam didn’t know, he couldn’t see clearly at the moment. All he knew that the thoughts about Blaine got harder and harder to ignore, in fact were pretty much present all the time by now and he needed to do something. More than have Brittany wear a black curled wig.

With flowers from Carols garden in his hand he walked to the front door. He also was wearing a tuxedo. One last deep breath. Maybe the evening would be good, maybe he would get send home in only a minute. Who knew.

He pressed the doorbell.

Blaine’s mother opened.

“Oh, hi, Sam. Blaine’s upstairs.”

“Thanks.” Sam smiled. She threw a look at the red tulips but didn’t say anything, so Sam felt excused.

Moments later he knocked on Blaine’s door.

“Come in!”

Now the last breath. In, out, and he pushed the door open.

“You’re right on time”, Blaine said. He was sitting on his desk, looking at some papers. Then he turned his head, and froze.

“Hey.” Sam shortly held up a hand.

“What?”

“I…” Sam took another deep breath while Blaine got up, but stayed close to his desk.

“I know we said… uhm. The thing is.” Sam looked at his flowers. Oh, he should give them to Blaine. He went to him and reached out his hand, and Blaine took the flowers.

“Thank you.”

“I have to admit that I can’t stop thinking about you”, Sam said. “So, uhm, I thought, maybe one little date wouldn’t hurt us?”

Blaine stared at him. He hadn’t even smelled the flowers yet, his eyes just got bigger and bigger.

“I don’t want to jeopardize our friendship”, he said.

“I know. I don’t want to, either. But I can’t do nothing, Blaine, I can’t.”

Sam wrung his hands. After a few silent moments he looked up at Blaine, still staring at him.

“Uh, let me put those…” Blaine gestured to the tulips.

Sam nodded, and when his friends was gone sat down on the bed. His knees wouldn’t have carried him any longer. Damn it, couldn’t Blaine say yes or no, instead of pulling it out for hours? Sam looked at his watch. Okay, he had arrived only a minute ago. Still.

“What do you… how…” Blaine came back, a vase with the flowers in his hand.

Sam jumped up because that was what gentlemen did.

“What if it doesn’t work out?” Blaine asked. “And we hate each other then?”

“What if it does work out?” Sam said. “And we miss a chance of some happiness?”

“What if it works out too well?” Blaine asked.

“How can anything go too well?”

“I mean, if we fall in love with each other and… and…”

“Would that be the worst that could happen?”

Blaine looked at the vase. He took it to the desk, then turned to Sam again.

“I would feel guilty, that’s it.”

“Why?”

“Because… I don’t deserve happiness with somebody as long as I made somebody else unhappy.”

Sam nodded. His knees got weaker by the second, and his confidence was about to vanish into thin air.

“You made a mistake. Everybody does that, Blaine. You’re not a bad person. You do deserve happiness. Of course, only if you want…”

Sam shrugged. He would drive home like a tough man, then crawl into his bed and eat ice cream like a little girl. No shame in that after having been rejected.

Blaine’s eyes got all soft.

“I do want to, Sam, you have no idea how much.”

Sam smiled. Ha, he had known Blaine would say yes!

“Then give it a try? Maybe not Breadstix, though.”

Blaine laughed, and with that, the night was saved.

* * *

 

They walked to a nice restaurant not far away from Blaine’s house, and it was the best evening ever. They laughed pretty much, probably because there was nervousness present. When they touched, it was different then before because it made Sam’s stomach all tingly and his heart jump with excitement. He couldn’t try a kiss in public, not in Ohio, even in this tolerant age. He didn’t want to risk any bullies ruining the night.

But on the way back home he took Blaine’s hand.

Silence was never awkward between them, normally. But now it was, a tiny bit, and it might’ve been the change in the atmosphere that they were not used to. Yet.

“I can’t believe this is happening”, Blaine eventually said.

“In a good way?”

“In a very good way. That’s why it feels so unreal. Like, too good to be true. When will I wake up, you know?”

“But you had nice things in your life before, didn’t you?”

“Yes.” Blaine inhaled deeply. “For some time, yes. But I’m not used to it. I’m used to being afraid that it will get taken away. Oh, I’m sorry, first date and I’m already whining.”

“Hey, I asked.” Sam squeezed Blaine’s hand. Suddenly there was a new Blaine, so fragile, so soft, and Sam wanted to protect him.

“On a date with Sam Evans.” Blaine let out a laugh. “Unbelievable.”

Sam laughed, too. Blaine was cute anyway, but just how sweet was he when he let on that he was crazy about Sam!? Adorable.

Since it was dark on the side walk between two lamps, Sam stood still and waited until Blaine had realised what was going on. Then he took a step closer and gently drove his fingers over Blaine’s cheek.

“Oh my”, Blaine whispered.

“You are so cute, and so sexy, Blaine, you’ve no idea what you’re doing to me.”

“Okay.” Blaine’s breathing got heavy, as did Sam’s. This was the moment that would define everything, their whole future. No pressure.

“Saham.”

Nose met nose, and a fruity scent entangled Sam. Their lips met for a short moment, a moment that left Sam breathless. They met again. And again. _Boom, boom, boom_ , all the fireworks he didn’t knew existed exploded in Sam’s body, setting his heart on fire.

“We should go home”, Blaine whispered when they parted.

“Yes.” Sam took a few more breathes, and cleared his head. “Yes. I will bring you home, and then leave. I don’t want us to rush anything.”

“That’s… sensible.”

“Yeah.”

It also was hard. They arrived at Blaine’s quickly, and kissed again. Sam wanted more, wanted to fumble with Blaine’s clothes until his finger touched bare skin with a warm pulse. But he didn’t. He pulled away, said good night and left like promised.

He knew it was the right thing to do so why did it feel so awful?

As soon as he was home he allowed himself a text to Blaine, though.

_I liked it. So much. I like U so much! Sleep well xoxo_

He didn’t need to wait for the answer, it came immediately.

_Me, too. Let’s repeat it soon. Sleep tight and have nice dreams! <3_

And that night, Sam did sleep really well for sure.

* * *

Sam saw Blaine the next time on Monday morning. He had pondered long about how they should behave in school and decided it was best to not let on they were dating now as long as they weren’t a steady thing. After all, Blaine had expressed so many doubts whether they would work out, whether he was over Kurt for real, and those were important reasons why Sam needed them to go slow, really slow. For Blaine’s sake but also for his own. Because if in the end Blaine decided for Kurt after all, Sam didn’t want to end up with a broken heart.

Although there was a slight chance that his heart would break already now if Blaine decided to pull out. Their kisses had been all Sam had thought about, to relive them again, to feel those fireworks again. They warmed up in his stomach the moment he saw Blaine standing at his locker.

“Hey, you”, Sam said, leaning against another locker. Blaine’s eyes met him and intensified the fire.

“Hey, yourself.” Blaine smiled.

“How was your weekend?”

“Oh, I had the best date ever”, Blaine said. “With a guy so hot, he took my breath away.”

Blaine stepped closer, and tried to kiss him. Sam leaned back.

“Woah. Wait. Let’s talk about it first”, he said.

“Oh. I… Okay, yeah, sure.” Blaine nodded, licked over his lips and went back to the locker.

“I just thought since you’re out…”

“It’s not about that. I mean, only last week we told everybody we’re not a thing. And don’t you want to wait until you’re sure about us?”

“Yeah. It’s cool.” Blaine nodded. He closed his locker and lifted his hand. “See you later, then.”

“Kay.” Sam nodded, too, and watched Blaine walk away. Somehow, his feelings weren’t as great anymore.

* * *

 

How wasn’t there any advice on the internet about how to go from being friends to lovers? Sure, there were some tipps on how to ask out a friend, but after that? Why did no one talk about the unsure feelings whether it was the right thing or not, about the fear that if they hurried into it they could regret it?

Sam had only one option left, and it wasn’t easy for him to take it.

But he seeked out Marley.

“Uhm”, he started the conversation. “I kind of need your advice?”

“Shoot away.”

As always, this important talk happened in between classes at the lockers. When you knew who had what locker you could trace them down so easily.

“Why were you so sure that Blaine loved me, as in, really _love_ , not just a crush? And that we belonged together? What if Blaine actually belongs to Kurt, his ex?”

“Well, for starters.” Marley put a book into her back pack and closed it. “The way he looks at you in general, but especially when he sang that Phil Collins song. I could feel his pain, and it felt more like a crush.”

“Excuse me? That’s your reason?” Sam goggled at her. She made him fall in love with Blaine all because she had a feeling? How stupid!

“I felt a vibe!” she said.

“Damn your vibes! You haven’t seen Blaine and Kurt together, maybe there would be a stronger vibe? What even _is_ a vibe?”

Sam shook his head. She had let him down like no Gleek ever before.

“Sam? What’s going on?”

Marley closed her locker and watched him carefully.

“Nothing. See you in Glee club.”

* * *

 

Glee club was uneventful and boring. Blaine didn’t look at him, and when it was over simply left without Sam. Naturally, Sam followed him and caught up.

“Hey! So, this weeks motto is ‘Songs about drinks’? How lame! Finn’s a lame teacher, right?”

“Huh? Oh, yeah.” Blain nodded.

“There are no songs about any drinks in the whole world! I’ll talk to him later.”

“Sure.”

“Will we see each other tonight?”

“As friends?” Blaine asked.

“Wh… why?”

“Well, as long as you’re not sure about us it’s better to stay friends, isn’t it?”

Sam’s jaw dropped.

“But you’re the one who isn’t sure.”

“Is that so?”

“Yes!”

“How great that you know my feelings better than I do.”

Blaine rounded a corner, and Sam was left to stare at a wall. What had gone wrong here? What had he done? Things with Blaine were supposed to be easy, always so easy. They could read each others minds. They didn’t need words, they simply understood each other. Right?

So why didn’t Sam know what the hell was going on?

And who could he ask for advice when it was about Blaine?

Well, he still knew one person to talk to. So he called her.

* * *

“To be clear, we’re not going to have sex”, Sam said the moment he entered Brittanys room.

“Oh. Why not?”

“Because I need to talk to you. About Blaine. I want to date him, but I’m not sure if he wants me, too.”

Sam sat down on the bed and absentmindedly petted Lord Tubbington. Brittany was working on the PC again, this time on her newest ‘Fondue for Two’ Episode.

But now she turned around in her chair.

“Why do you want to date him? I thought you and I are dating.”

Sam frowned.

“We’re friends with benefits, are we not? I mean, you’ve got your neighbour girlfriend…”

“She’s not my girlfriend. We just have sex. _You_ are my boyfriend.”

“Well. Then I’m afraid to tell you that I want to break up with you.”

“Oh.” Brittany pulled a face.

Sam couldn’t believe this. “Are you going to make a scene?”

“I thought we would date until the end of the school year and only break up because I got into MIT.”

“Uhm. Right. I’m sorry but I thought you… were… MIT? Really?”

“And later in life, I will marry Santana.”

“But for now, you want to date me?”

“Yes, that is correct.”

“Well, I want to date Blaine. Exclusively.”

“But he will marry Kurt someday. Maybe even the same day Santana and I get married.”

“How can you be so sure?”

“I know the future, Sam. You will end up with Mercedes.”

“Look. You can dream, sure, but I have a say in that, don’t I? And I want to end up with Blaine. And he with me. Not Kurt. That is an option, right?”

Brittany shook her head.

“It’s not. It’s written in the stars, and the stars never change their mind.”

“Right.” Sam studied Lord Tubbington, who watched him.

“Can we have sex now?” Brittany asked.

“No.” Sam got up. “I’m out of here. We’re breaking up. I’m sorry, so sorry but… that’s it.”

“Oh. Okay.” Brittany shrugged and turned to her PC again. For a second, Sam looked at her with disbelieve. Then, he hurried out of the house, swallowing down the fat lump in his throat. He had thought he meant something to her. At least a little bit. But well.

 


End file.
